Soul 18: Wendy

How can you be strong and vulnerable? I tend to be independent, to depend on myself to get things done. I think this stems from my childhood, my mom had to do so much around the house and especially when my dad was sick, my mom had to manage the running of the household, without much help from my dad. I was happy mowing lawns and doing yard work, not just doing household chores,  like vacuuming and dusting. As an adult I carry this same philosophy, but I appreciate my husband with all he does to help around the house, he is my rock. There are times when I need his emotional and moral support, when I realize I am not superwoman, and I can’t do it all by myself. I know when I am weak, my Savior is there for me every step of the way.

What advice would you give to the next generation of strong women? It is good to be independent, but don’t put so much pressure on yourself,  if you can’t do something on your own. It is ok to ask for help! Asking for help is not a sign of weakness.

Wendy’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I used my money for our COVID fund at church. I was hoping I would see how it helped someone in a particular way, but being at home with the quarantine, you are not having so much contact with people to find out what the needs are out there. After I donated my money, I kept hearing of different needs from individuals. The need to help others is always there, sometimes we may not have a connection to the situation, but God puts us where he needs us in order to spread his loving kindness.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? I was honored to be asked to do this by Kristen. I hope my story may have an impact on someone.

Soul 17: Tammi

What does "being strong" mean to you? Being strong has many facets. It includes confidence, emotion, knowledge, and competence. I find strength in educating myself, whether it be from reading a research article or a good book, or interacting with others to learn and share in the human experience. Over time this has helped me grow into a mature, open minded person.

How do you encourage other women to be strong? I love to approach and communicate with others, whether it be a simple greeting, giving a compliment, or inquiring about a specific topic. The confidence to come out and interact with others helps us share in our life experience and build a positive community of strong women. Even by sharing our experiences of weakness, the connection it builds makes us stronger.

Tammi’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I purchased items which would benefit individuals who live and rehabilitate at the skilled nursing facility that I work at.

I purchased 140 pencils, 80 pens, 50 notebooks, 12 pencil sharpeners, 14 calendars, 5 address books, 5 reading glasses and 5 magnifying glasses. The remaining $22.90 after purchasing those items was donated to the Activities Department at the facility, which works to provide quality of life enrichment to the residents.

I wanted the gift to touch as many people as I could, particularly those who are elderly, disabled, and often forgotten. Often individuals who come into nursing facilities for rehabilitation after a hospitalization come with almost nothing; very little clothing and often do not have their own essentials, such as their glasses, cell phone, or even the means to write things down. I often find myself searching for simple items such as a pen or notebook, or even a pair of reading glasses so that they can read a message from their doctor or insurance company. A lengthy hospitalization can also be disorienting, thus calendars are important to orient people and give a sense of planning for the future

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? This process may have been given to me, but in essence I was able to also share it with many others. Making a positive impact can have such a strong, lasting effect on my own and other individuals lives.

Soul 16: Michelle

How can you be strong and vulnerable? I think it takes strength to be vulnerable and vulnerability to be strong. Looking up the definition of vulnerable, the first thing I see is “susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm.” Yikes! That sounds like something people usually try to avoid! It takes strength (and wisdom) to step out in a way that allows others an upper hand, so to speak. Sharing honestly about something that made you upset, acting on something you care strongly about, an idea you have, applying to a job...those are all vulnerable things. And they can change people, change situations, and change the world. I think about those who stood up for racial justice during the civil rights era in the US. They put themselves in a very vulnerable position when doing sit-ins, bus rides, marches. That took strength! I have spoken in a large setting several times, a few career-focused and a few faith-focused. I put myself out there, shared some of my own story, shared my ideas, not knowing what the response would be. That type of risk takes strength and vulnerability.

What advice would you give to the next generation of strong women? Life is not easy. We are not in control of our circumstances. All we can control (or at least try to control) is ourselves, our own attitudes and reactions to things. So my advice is to focus on that. Get rid of “should” and replace it with “want” or “need” or “will.” Don’t be afraid of emotions, just don’t let them control you. Be honest with yourself about what it is you really want and who you are, what your doubts and fears are, what your strengths and weaknesses are. Don’t try to hide or put on a perfect front. People are all imperfect and messy, but that doesn’t make us any less valuable. That just makes us human. Have compassion and kindness for yourself and others. In the end, we are all humans trying to make it the best we can.

What’s one thing someone could do today to make them stronger? : Take 5-10 minutes and sit (or stand or walk) in silence, no phone, music, tv, or other people talking. And listen to yourself. Listen to your mind, heart, and body. Is there anything you are feeling or thinking that you didn’t realize before? How does your body feel? Any tension you were unaware of? Is there any action you are prompted to take, whether reaching out to someone, asking for help, praying, doing something fun, apologizing, forgiving, just resting. Things can be so noisy today that we can lose touch with ourselves and get overwhelmed and driven by things around us. I think it is important to take that time to disconnect from all the noise and just be still.

Michelle’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I gave $50 to my local Habitat for Humanity chapter and $50 to the Native American Health Center (NAHC). Having a solid, stable home is such an important thing in life, and I love how Habitat for Humanity partners with people who need a good home to get them one. I donated to NAHC because it is my understanding that COVID-19 has disproportionately impacted Native American communities. So, I wanted to contribute to help with the response and support effort in those communities.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? It took me a while to figure out where I wanted to give the money to. There are so many good causes and people in need. These are 2 organizations we had supported on a one-time basis before and I was so glad to be able to support them again!

Soul 15: Laurie

Who is a female role model in your life and why? My mother has been a role model to me. She has brought a lot of joy to myself and others. For example, when she was in her mid sixties, she led a line dancing class for senior women. They would perform in nursing homes and at a summer arts festival. Her group brought a lot of joy to the nursing home residents and the women in the group had a lot of fun themselves.

How can you be strong and vulnerable? Being vulnerable is risky. It takes courage, which is basically a strength of heart, to be vulnerable. When I am secure in myself and know that I have value, it’s easier to be open about who I really am, weaknesses and all.

Laurie’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100?

• My mother lives very far away from me. I wanted to bring joy to her day. She likes getting things in the mail. I spent $20 to send my mother macadamia nuts which she very much enjoys eating. My sister has been having some very painful and debilitating health issues for several months. I spent $40 to send her a care package. It included a book she likes, a cute zippered bag, some cough drops to ease the dryness of her mouth and a card. My mother and sister live so far away I don’t get to see them very often. I call and text but enjoyed being able to bring them joy despite the miles between us.

• Kristen’s friend Heather is blessing so many in Niger, Africa, I decided to send her the balance of the money along with an additional $100 from my husband and I. Heather is working many hours to help so many others and I hope this gift encourages her. I know she will use it wisely whether for personal needs or to help others.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? It was an honor to be a part of it. It helped me be more intentional in looking for opportunities to bless others. I received joy in being able to encourage them. My husband and I are planning on giving $100 to a friend of mine so she can experience the “Intentional Act of Kindness” process also.

Soul 14: Lauren

How have your trials made you stronger? When I was 15 my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer for the first time. It is a surreal thing to witness your mother, your caretaker, become so completely helpless and dependent on others for all of her needs. The day that she went into remission I remember every detail, from where I was sitting down to what the weather was like. As do I the day she told me the cancer returned. I was newly married, had an infant and lived a state away. For the next four years, I would travel back and forth to San Diego for weeks at a time to be with my mother and soak up as much time as I could. She passed away in 2012. This trial has continued to shape and strengthen me in ways I, at the time, could have never imagined. It strengthened my sympathy and allowed me to support and be a strength for others when they are going through difficult seasons. It has strengthened my understanding of God's goodness even when circumstances are anything but. It has strengthened my ability to have peace in the midst of anxious times. All of these things have led to an overall strengthening of who I am as a wife, mother and woman because I am able to offer myself more fully to those around me.

Who is a female role model in your life and why? My mentor Mary has been given the nickname "the velvet brick". She is soft and gentle, kind and caring but she is also tough as nails, won't back down from what she knows is right and true and good but the driving motivation is never to be right and always to be kind. Mary has taught me much of what I know strength to be. She has taught me humility, to extend grace, to know that we don't have every answer or know every situation and to advocate for others. She has taught me to face my challenges head on, to not shy away from speaking up for myself but to do so with a motivation of love because anything else is self serving.

What advice would you give to the next generation of strong women? When you are pushing hard after strength find a woman a little ahead of you that you admire, not to chase after her or compete with her but to learn, share and let yourself be shaped and challenged by her. When you invite her into your life, invite her all the way in. Share the hard, the beautiful, the scary and the shameful. Her strength comes not from navigating away from all of those things in her own life but through working them out in community with others. Allow yourself to be led, ask hard questions and let yourself be wrong.

Lauren’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? With the $100 that was given, I chose to buy gift cards for a woman I know who is continuing to work as an essential worker during this pandemic. The idea of a strong woman encouraged and inspired me to pick someone who embodied strength. I don't want to share too much of this person's story, but she is working hard and exhibiting strength daily. It was wonderful to be able to gift her with groceries and coffee.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? At first, I over thought it. I wanted to make sure that I was doing it "right". When I freed myself up from that expectation, it was lovely. It felt like such a gift to be able to pray through who the Lord wanted to bless through this process. He very clearly spoke and it was wonderful to have the means to just obey.

Soul 13: Bethany

How did/does family shape your perception of strength? I grew up in a family with very strong women. My great grandmother lived until she was 100 and very much ruled our family. She did so with dignity, grace, and an unwavering devotion to Jesus. We all tried to live up to her example. She was a hard worker, running a farm into her 90s. She was slow to speak and when she did, you knew you better listen - it was sure to be words of wisdom or an unexpected joke.

When she died, my family fell apart. My grandfather, her son, quickly began showing signs of dementia, an uncle left his wife, a cousin abandoned his family, secrets of sexual abuse among the family were finally shared, uncles and aunts exploded at each other and some still don't speak to each other 16 years later.
I began to understand that my 'God fearing family' didn't fear God, they feared Grandma's disapproval.

What keeps you strong in times of trial? Jesus, hands down, 100% Jesus keeps me strong.

How have your trials made you stronger? I was sexually abused as a young kid. I was old enough to understand that what was happening was wrong, but not old enough to know that I could fight for myself or say no to someone who I'd been told to respect. I remember thinking 'my mom is going to be so mad at me,' and shame set in. I spent most of my childhood living with a deep sense of shame and tried hard to hide all that felt messed up inside.

In my early 20s I began to experience heavy spiritual attack. I was afraid, confused, and calling out to God to make it all stop. As I prayed I felt God say "tell someone." I knew exactly what He was referring to, exactly what I had to share. I was terrified to open up. I finally shared with three close girl friends; the unanimous response was 'me too, and I've never been able to tell anyone.' I know that's a trending response right now, but 17 years ago it was not.

In sharing with others, I found freedom from my shame and I found that opening up about my pain could help others find freedom as well. Throughout the next few years, I experienced the 'nudge' to share my trials with others and EVERY time someone opened up 'for the first time.' I became thankful for that particular trial and the chance to see shame turn into freedom. I've tried to carry that into the rest of my life - being honest with things that, if kept inside, could create shame. I also became a fighter - I will fight for myself against abusive authority and I will fight for others.

Bethany’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use your $100? I gave my $100 to a friend from high school. She is a mother of five kids who has been dealing with a lot lately. Her oldest, a 12 year old, has been suffering from intestinal issues for years and has been undergoing a series of surgeries to correct it. They are facing a lot of medical debt as well as personal debt as they have made many sacrifices to get him to all of his necessary appointments. $100 is just a drop in the bucket but as I shared their go-fund-me online, I saw three others donate based on my share. It was amazing to see how my donation encouraged others to give as well. This family had been on my heart for a while but I had always hesitated, feeling like the little I would give wouldn't go far enough. I was wrong. Every little bit helps and my actions can encourage others to act as well.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? It was more difficult that I thought it would be. I feel like I hear of so many needs each day and it was not easy choosing. It was amazing to have the opportunity to have $100 set aside that I was required to give. It helped me see past all the excuses and rationalizations for not giving to a certain 'cause' or need. I had to give the money away - it wasn't mine to keep. It has changed the way that I now treat our finances. I have given more away these past few months than I have in a long time.

Soul 12: Tiana

How did/does family shape your perception of strength?: For me, my first perception of strength was by observing my mom and dad. I was raised by two hard working parents, so in my adolescence, a “strong person” was a diligent worker. Late adolescence I remember thinking that being strong was the ability to hold back tears so I could be “strong” for my sister while my parents were divorcing. Now, I believe that it takes immense strength to reveal vulnerable states to trusted people, a step that is important in the healing process. We are continually redefining and deepening our understanding of “strength” throughout different periods of life, new experiences, observing others, and particularly after rising up from the lows. So for me, family showed me a concrete aspect of strength, but most of my adult abstract perceptions of strength have come from learned experiences later on.

Who is a female role model in your life and why?: My Bachan (grandma)! Not only is she physically strong (shoveling feet of snow in her driveway in her 90s), she is also emotionally and mentally strong. Bachan grew up on a farm, and as a kid she was expected to do well in school and work on the farm. She didn’t have time to play. Her high school years were spent imprisoned at Heart Mountain, a Japanese internment camp. She lived through subsequent years of hateful racism for decades after the war ended. What does her life look like now? She drives her Japanese church friends to the casino once weekly, prepares meals for church members, watches her favorite sports teams on TV, and is loved dearly by her four kids and grandchildren. Life could be very different for her depending on her reaction to the hardships she faced. I admire her tenacity, graciousness, and patient nature.

When has your strength been personally challenged and how did you respond?: In my late teens and through my early 20s, I went to numerous doctor appointments in hopes to figure out why I was physically and mentally tired all the time. I had specialists who told me I was “just depressed”, that I was just “out of shape”, and that my mom had “caused my anxiety”. Four years later I was sent to Sleep Medicine and tested positive for Narcolepsy, a life-long sleep disorder characterized by excessive daytime sleepiness. At first, I was relieved to know that there WAS something physiologically wrong with me; it wasn’t just “in my head” – but after the relief wore off, resentment flooded in. Will I be able to continue on my pre-med track and be a successful doctor? Will my fatigue let me handle pregnancy? My questions were endless and life felt hopeless yet again.

After months of self-pity I told myself I had to move forward. This fatigued, foggy brained person is my new baseline and I need to learn how to love myself, and live life to the fullest. In this time, strength was turning my resentment into a new gratefulness for myself. It was appreciating the hardship associated with Narcolepsy because it left me with a greater compassion toward others struggling and hurting. Strength was also releasing my ego and applying to medical school despite having a considerably lower GPA than the average student accepted. It was persevering each day and liberating vulnerable tears when needed. It was doing my best but also reaching out for help.

Ask me again in five years when I am done with medical school and residency for answer part two.

Tiana’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I gave $100 to a young woman in my community. I knew I wanted to give the full $100 to a sole person. I wanted it to go to a woman, to recognize the strength she has shown despite continual barriers. I wanted it to go to a humble, kind-hearted, tenacious person. My partner is very involved in the Bellingham community and recommended a very deserving beneficent.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? Fun! It's not every day that you get to hand $100 to a person you just met. I look forward to seeing how others use the "intentional Act of Kindness" and the number of different communities this project will touch!!

Soul 11: Ashley

What does "being strong" mean to you? Being strong can mean so much! It’s not just physical bodily strength (although it certainly can be! #girlpower), but strength of character as well. To me being strong means doing the right thing, even when it is hard. Consistently choosing better. Whether that is speaking up against injustice when no one else is, or being faithful to your commitments even when you’re tired and would prefer to skip out.

How do you encourage other women to be strong? Seeing others’ strengths and calling them out, in a real and genuine way. Women can be so terrible with comparison. Why do we do that to ourselves?? We compare our bodies, our parenting, our spouses, marriages, houses, careers (or lack of)... it’s toxic. But when we truly see the strengths in another woman and, rather than be jealous or intimidated by them, choose to encourage that aspect of her... that draws out the strength of individuals in a beautiful way.

Ashley’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I was able to gift it to a family who was moving and had huge financial needs. The Lord brought them to mind! It was also Christmas time and they were not sure how they were going to be able to get gifts for their children. This was able to help!

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? Really fun! It is such a joy to be able to give to others who were in need and be a conduit for Jesus to love them and meet practical needs.

Soul 10: Rose

How did/does family shape your perception of strength? I perceived strength to be the ability to get your way or influence decisions to be favorable to you. In my family of origin, the person who was the loudest or the most stubborn was most likely to get their way. This led me to believe that I had to make things happen for myself and that ultimately everyone was out for their own best interest. It also led me to never want to be the “weaker” partner in a marriage.

In my own marriage, I have learned that these tendencies of mine from my family of origin are toxic and destructive to a mutually flourishing marriage. It sounds silly but it still blows my mind that my husband regularly seeks out things that are for my own best interest. Through my husband’s example, I am learning that leading out of humility and being vulnerable can be incredibly powerful. I am so grateful that my marriage is challenging and changing what I perceive strength to be.

Who is a female role model in your life and why? My grandmother. She modeled a life of faithfulness to Jesus in the face of impossible circumstances. She refused to renounce her faith in Jesus during Japanese occupation (Korea was annexed by Japan for 30 years. While many atrocities were committed, the persecution of Christians was the most severe). When newly formed North Korea revealed freedom of religion would no longer be allowed, she left everything (e.g., her family/friends, ancestral land, wealth/privilege, a comfortable life) to flee to South Korea where she could worship God freely. In South Korea, she lived decades in abject poverty in a refugee camp and continued to believe in a good and faithful God (while losing children to death and poverty). She believed this God was so good, so faithful, indeed—the source of life itself, that he was worth losing everything for. He was worth it all.

In her life, I also see the incredible faithful of God in providing, protecting, and blessing her descendants. I have been so blessed beyond words to intimately know the same God, but also, to be a recipient of such immeasurable grace in Jesus and incredible tangible blessings.

She was a woman of faith, of strength. A woman who lived a life of surrendered trust to a God who showed himself good, faithful and worthy of it all.

Rose’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? My heart is just broken for those that are hurting and suffering right now. My hope was that these funds would help bring hope to others.

• I gave $38.01 to Korean American Family Services to help fund and maintain a 24/7 crisis hotline, which has doubled in calls from domestic violence victims sequestered at home with their abusers due to COVID-19 restrictions. As a Korean American survivor of domestic violence, I yearn for others who are struggling with domestic violence and brokenness to find hope.

• I spent $11.99 to purchase a book for a young woman. I came across a Facebook post on a mommy group where a young woman I did not know shared her hurts and pains about being a new mother to two young children. My heart broke for her and I really desired to share with her the hope and comfort I had in Jesus. I had a difficult time engaging her via Messenger, however, since we were both so busy with our children. But she was very interested in reading a book I recommended. It gave me a lot of joy to purchase and send her a copy of Risen Motherhood: Gospel Hope for Everyday Moments.

• I contributed $50 to a friend who is starting a YouTube channel focused on making Bible teaching more accessible to millennials. With all that is going on, I believe more than ever that our eyes need to be pointed back to the hope that can only be found in a personal relationship with Jesus. Also, due to COVID-19, he is currently without a job. It gave me a lot of joy to give to a friend who I knew and deeply trusted.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? I was surprised by how strongly I desired to engage in long and careful consideration over the spending of the $100. Perhaps because I felt I was spending on someone else’s behalf, I really wanted my giving to be heartfelt and deeply meaningful. There were times where this exercise felt like a burden (because of my limited availability). But, having gone through the exercise process, I’ve grown not only in knowing myself but also in knowing what brings me joy. Thank you for this opportunity to participate. It has been such a blessing!

Soul 9: Stephanie

How do you encourage other women to be strong? I have been given a platform to reach out to a younger generation of ladies. As a high school soccer coach, I am able to influence a large number of high school girls. I encourage them to be strong by helping them be confident in who they are. It is important for them to know that other people do not set their identity. When a young girl believes in herself and is able to not let the world influence the way she sees herself, that is true strength.

What advice would you give to the next generation of strong women? Advice that I would give to the next generation of strong women is don't be afraid to be yourself. If you are a female that enjoys sports, don't let the world tell you it’s manly and you shouldn't play sports. There are people who think women should fit a certain norm, but it is ok to be a variety of things. You can be sporty and girly at the same time. You don't have to fit one mold. Be proud of who you are and the abilities you have been given. God made you the woman you are for a reason and be confident in that.

Stephanie’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I used the $100 for a coworker whose house burnt down and lost everything. I can’t imagine only being left with the clothes on my back and nothing else. I thought giving the money to my coworker would be very meaningful to him, in his loss. I know the money can’t replace all that was lost, but it was a small way to show that someone cares and wants to help in even the smallest possible way.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? It was rewarding to help someone that had just gone through such a huge life changing moment. I know there are so many people out there that are in need and just knowing a small act of kindness can impact someone’s life makes me want to see how I can be there for other people that are struggling.

Soul 8: Rachel

How have your trials made you stronger? My trials have played a huge part in developing who I am today. They’ve built into my life passion, perseverance, and deeper character change that has gone far beyond the surface behavior change I could ever have changed on my own. And with each trial it has deepened my relationship with Jesus and because of that, has in turn, made me stronger.

What advice would you give to the next generation of strong women? You are enough. Don’t compromise who you are for someone else's opinion or love. In today’s society, there are plenty of apps, social media forums, and magazines that will gladly define you if you let it. Know where and who your self-worth and value comes from. Embrace your weaknesses and allow them to make you strong and build your character.

Rachel’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100?

• $50: I chose to spend the first $50 on gas for someone to go see their loved one in the hospital 3 hours away. His wife was just admitted to the ICU and money was tight for them. As I was speaking to him, I felt like I was supposed to help out in some way.

• $50: For the second $50, I chose to bless some foster care families within my community. I bought 3 gift cards ( 2-$15 and 1-$20) to give to foster moms. Fostering can be a lonely gig. It’s hard to parent a child that you will love forever, but have to say goodbye to. They bless so many kids, that I wanted to in some way return that blessing to them.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? It was truly an honor participating in the Intentional Act of Kindness! It made me pause and really think about how I could be intentionally kind to those around me. It took the focus off me and opened my eyes to the needs of those around me. And even though the $100 has run out, I’m still going to look for ways in which I can be intentionally kind to those inside and outside of my community.

Soul 7: Cassee

How did/does your culture shape your perception of strength? : I grew up around some very strong Filipino women. When my birth mother left my dad and I, my grandma (my dad’s mom) helped raise me. She is a very “strong” Filipino woman. My dad met my step mom when I was 5 and she was also a “strong” Filipino woman. Not to mention all the aunties I saw around me who were also “strong” Filipino women. So I would say that my culture growing up was matriarchal with a lot of “strong” Filipino women around me.

So what did it mean to be a “strong” Filipino woman growing up? It meant being the rock for your family and not letting emotions get in the way of leading your family. Crying was a sign of weakness. It meant managing the household finances and disciplining the children. It meant always having the final say. It meant avoiding any issues to keep the peace in the household. It meant not talking about hard things and sweeping issues under the rug. Women in my culture felt pride and dignity in living out this perception of strength.

As I began to shape and form my own definition of strength, I experienced a lot of tension between what I had seen growing up and what I was discovering. My view of strength shifted from never showing any sign of weakness, to in my weakness there is strength because of Jesus. This continues to be a struggle for me but when I stay true to this belief, I know it only makes me stronger.

How have your trials made you stronger?: The biggest trial I have endured throughout my whole life is the abandonment I experienced from my mother as a baby. Since I was taught to push my feelings down and move on with life, this trauma came out in many ways throughout my life including depression, crippling anxiety, people-pleasing, and major avoidance just to name a few. I have had to learn to face my pain and hurt and that has made me stronger every time something comes up that is rooted in my abandonment. I’ve learned to accept the hurt and work through it instead of trying to avoid it. Every time I have to do this, it creates growth which for me, increases strength. When I learn something about myself and grow from it, it makes me feel stronger to face the next trial to come.

Cassee’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I decided to give my $100 to a missionary who expressed a financial need on social media for some medical bills. She is literally counting on the generosity of other people to live, survive, and do what God is calling her to in San Francisco. I think that is extremely admirable and brave. She does ministry in the most dangerous part of the city with the most crime and drug abuse (The Tenderloin for those who know the Bay Area). She is young, single and SO brave! She works with women and children there to share Jesus and love with them in many different ways through her ministry.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? This process was honestly more difficult than I thought. I realized a lot of interesting things within myself. Since it was someone else's money that was given to me to give to someone else, I kept doubting every place that I wanted to give it. What if that isn't a worthy cause? What if it is not a good use of the money? But I had to realize that the whole point I was given the money was because I was trustworthy enough to steward it well.

I also had a hard time finding people "in need" of the money. I realized that people don't always talk about their financial situations openly because it's such a vulnerable thing. Also, that living in the suburbs of Portland, the term "need" is relative AND working from home limits my interactions with people outside my community. So it was difficult finding a place to give the money. I ended up giving it to someone outside of this area because I felt like the need was greater and I know what it's like living in San Francisco on a low income. I felt compassion and empathy for her which was the motivation in deciding to give the $100 to her.

Overall, it was a really neat and interesting experience. It really stretched me. It pushed me outside of my comfort zone and really got me thinking about money and generosity in a different way. I've never experienced anything like someone else giving me money to give to someone else so it was definitely a new experience for me.

Soul 6: Julia

What does "being strong" mean to you? I used to think that strength was the absence of weakness. Or perceived weakness, anyway. Despite however weak I've felt over the course of my life--and there were plenty of times I've collapsed into a balling mess on my bed because of how small or insignificant I've felt in the wake of what I was facing--I figured if I never let it show, or only let it show after the fact, then I was being strong. I was handling what I needed to handle all by myself. Like a big girl.

But over the past couple years, I've begun to see that strength isn't merely the absence of weakness, but rather it is inextricably linked with vulnerability--in being able to admit defeat or admit when I'm wrong, or to ask for help when I need it. Strength is not closing oneself off, but opening oneself up.

It takes so much more courage and determination to let your guard down in the face of a maelstrom than to simply ball up your fists and pretend everything's fine. Playing pretend costs you nothing, while being vulnerable risks attack; a perceived annihilation of the self. But of course, we can only play pretend for so long before the world we've created begins to fall apart, just as we, too, will fall apart as we try to fake it and ignore our own exhaustion.

So while I still believe that being strong is perseverance, diligence, and dedication, I know it's also mercy. It's also grace--for others, but especially for yourself. And it's also wisdom in determining when to accept you can no longer do things on your own.

How do you encourage other women to be strong? Honestly, I try to encourage other women to be strong by showing them how radiant they are without anyone having to add a single thing to them.

I think one of the biggest struggles we face as women is not simply who we are, but how to show it. How to stand strong in our truth without fear of ridicule, shame, or critique. So often in modern society, we're told "Just be yourself!" And yet all the ads and commercials surrounding us are of ways to alter, enhance, or change entirely who we are to make us more attractive or appealing to others--most of whom don't even care in the first place.

"Being ourselves" isn't as easy as it seems, as often so many of us have either lost, forgotten, or never known who we are to begin with. We've been through abusive relationships. We've had to WORK for so long we haven't had time to focus on us. We've fought through body-shaming and gender biases, familial struggles and continuous subversive sexual discrimination, and through it all society has told us what "strong" looks like: be the mom that works full-time and still has time for the kids; be the CEO who also has a social life; be hot, but not too hot; coy but outgoing; submissive yet in control; artsy and techy; thin, but also know how to gorge oneself... I mean, the list of dichotomies goes on. And somehow, we still strive to reach those unattainable goals.

Instead, I want to see what other women get excited about--in the world, in others, and in themselves. I want to observe what it is that sets that light in their eyes, and I want to follow it. I want to spur it on, ask them questions, see them run with that passion or curiosity, and watch how they grow and they thrive. What's even more beautiful is that when we encourage one another, in empathy and compassion, to be comfortable in who we are, we also give permission to others to do the same. And that sort of support spreads fast.

And beyond being strong in ourselves, I believe that being strong around others also means accepting that we can't always carry the weight we wish we could carry. It means reaching out, saying "I'm not okay," and allowing others to catch us when we're so weak we can barely stand. Sure, we have to fight--but we've always known that. Women have had to fight and strive and struggle for thousands of years. We've got that. We can do that. Now we have to know when to be still--to be content with ourselves, even when our struggles overwhelm us, or when others try to tell us what we should do.

I want to be the sort of woman that allows others to show their most vulnerable selves and be accepted for it, and in so accepting themselves, they can do the same for others. In this way--in this place of vulnerability and courage, of acceptance and empathy--I believe the world will be changed.

Julia’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I donated to the following four organizations:

• $25 to Charity:Water, a nonprofit bringing clean, sustainable drinking water to communities in need

• $25 to Northwest Immigration Rights Project, a nonprofit offering pro bono consultation and representation for immigrants

• $25 to Y-We - a Seattle-based, majority women-of-color led organization cultivating the power of diverse young women to be creative leaders and courageous change-makers through community-oriented collaborations.

• $25 to Freedom Project WA - a nonprofit promoting healing and restoration for men and women both in and out of prison through the strategies of nonviolent communication, mindfulness, racial equity, and anti-oppression.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? In the past, I've felt frozen, guilty for wanting to pursue my passion (writing) while simultaneously knowing there were so many people who aren't given that same privilege, and also feeling that writing wasn't enough. That I needed to be making a bigger impact, or else it didn't count. However, coming to the recent realization that writing is my own form of making a difference, of connecting to people and encouraging them in the limited space I have, I was freed to find and donate to the organizations that are truly making a huge impact on issues close to my heart.

There are so many communities across the world, let alone in the U.S. right now, that are going through their own forms of hell, and all I wanted to do was write. How messed up was that? What good would writing do?

I mean, what's happening at the border is devastating, but I felt powerless to do anything. People of color getting arrested and sent unjustly to prison either for crimes they didn't commit or on small charges for which others get off so easily is an unconscionable display of inequality. Humans all over the world struggling to find mere clean drinking water and dying for it is horrible and painful, and here I was in my apartment feeling both ridiculously privileged, guilty for feeling burdened, and like my voice was just a drop in the ocean.

Then I wrote a little letter to myself (a form of journaling to help myself process), reminding me that my personal story is important, and sometimes, simply giving voice to that story is enough; there need be no other reason than self-expression and authenticity. We all want to feel seen and heard and understood, and sometimes the best way for us to do so is to read others' experiences and say "hey, I can relate to that!" If other blog posts and books could do that for me, I knew I could do that for others as well.

And I was freed.

I found the gift of $100 was a gift in more ways than one.

Soul 5: Madeline

Who is a female role model in your life and why? Without a doubt, my mom is the number one female role model in my life. I have never met a woman with more love, strength, wisdom, and conviction. She does everything with passion— loving Jesus, caring for her children, loving other people...the list goes on and on. She is a beautiful example in my life of a strong woman who lives solely to glorify the Lord.

How can you be strong and vulnerable? I think the rawest form of beauty is found in being being both strong and vulnerable. Actually, to be vulnerable is, in a sense, to be strong, because it takes courage to be vulnerable. Someone who is vulnerable says, “here I am, here are my weaknesses and flaws, here are my struggles and fears.” And someone who is strong says, “there is hope found on these other side of these fears, and I am not afraid to look these fears in the face and work through them.”

Madeline’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I gave the money to two different missionaries who are also my personal friends. The first missionary is a 19-year old named Timmy, who is a missionary in the United States with YWAM, specifically with a branch called “Circuit Riders.” The goal of Circuit Riders is to travel around the whole U.S. and preach the gospel and ignite hope and a passion for Jesus amongst high school and college students. The other missionaries are actually a married couple named Brian and Stacey. They are also local missionaries, living in Washington state, through an amazing organization called Fellowship of Christian Athletes. Their passion is for preaching the gospel and showing the love of Jesus through high school sports ministry.

I continue to be incredibly inspired by all three of these missionaries and I also deeply value their friendship. With a desire in my heart to use medicine as an avenue for ministry, I am continually challenged and encouraged by the sacrifice that Timmy, Brian, and Stacey give in order to put their faith and love for Jesus into action. They also fiercely trust the Lord with their finances, so I am thankful to have used this opportunity to financially support them.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? It was such a sweet experience. What a gift to be able to take another gift and pass it along, in order to bless and encourage someone. I think this process is exactly what the Holy Spirit desires of us— to be intentionally kind and to intentionally give.

Soul 4: Kyrie

How does your culture shape your perception of strength? My culture often defines strength as physical or as the ability to control emotions (to have no emotions). If you look at the women portrayed in movies these days the heroines are all physically strong (able to do what the men can do), and there is a stoicism about them. They do not smile as often because not smiling makes them look tough. I recognize that is not the only form of strength. And yet I see myself and others want to be seen as tough, as an equal, as capable, as non-emotional. It is a struggle to see the examples portrayed in the media and not want to be like them. But at what cost do we strive to be tough, to be physically strong, to not ask for help because it makes us look weak, or hide our emotions?

What keeps you strong in times of trial? Knowing that this life is temporary and my God is good.

Kyrie’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? A friend of mine recently lost her husband and is now the sole breadwinner for her now family of three. Her husband left them with a brand new house and no way to pay it off. She had been on my heart as I knew they were raising money to move back home to live with her family and start over. My heart went out to her and I gave her the full $100 in an effort to help with the transition. I could not imagine being in the situation she is in and feeling so helpless.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? It was quite simple really. She clearly needed help and when I received the $100, I used it right away. Anything I could do to help a friend in need.

Soul 3: Iris

How does family shape your perception of strength? Both of my parents are great role models to me and have shaped my perception of strength. My mother, who went to the best university in Taiwan and has a Master’s degree, gave up her potential career to be a mother to my brother and me. Looking back on her life, she regards it as God’s greatest blessing to her that she never worked when we were young. When I was in 6th grade, I distinctly remember a time when I got a poor grade and she was very upset with me. However, after she had yelled at me, she apologized, and vowed to never become angry about my grades again. Her ability to swallow her pride and recognize her own weakness is a model to me for what true strength means. My father grew up with significant family issues, and experienced quite a bit of suffering. Yet, he persevered through prayer and dependency on God, and doesn’t hold bitterness towards anyone and sees the best in everyone. When we were in elementary school, my dad decided my brother and I were old enough to hear about his childhood, and spent a series of time telling us one story a night of the trials he had faced. The stories broke our hearts, but his vulnerability and strength amazed us. He is a model to me that true strength is showing who we really are.

How did/does your culture shape your perception of strength? I am a second-generation Taiwanese-American. My parents moved from Taiwan to the United States in their late-twenties to pursue their graduate studies. In Asian culture, and most Eastern cultures, strength and identity are found in community, not as individuals. This has shaped me to recognize strength as not just personal, but communal. I grew up in a Chinese church in New Jersey full of immigrant families, where no one had blood relatives in the United States, and where our church community truly became our family. When people got married or passed away, everyone in the church was invited to gather at the church for the ceremony or service. When people were sick, others brought meals and cared for the family as their own. True strength, in my opinion, is shown in how we love one another and by how strong we have made our community.

Iris’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100?

• $65: I brought a meal and wrote a card to the family of a woman in our church who recently suffered a stroke. Since she was being treated a distance away from her home, her family would spend all day with her, and not have the time to cook at night. I wanted to encourage her family, show my support and love for them in a tangible way, and make their difficult situation just a tiny bit easier.

• $14: I bought a copy of the book One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp and shipped it to my friend. She's currently an elementary school teacher and has been struggling with wanting to quit. I've been in the same situation when I was a teacher, and this book was really influential for me in learning how to find joy every day, even when it doesn’t seem possible. I hope that through this book she will find her joy in God no matter what her situation is.

• $12: I bought my coworker flowers and a mason jar as a vase for her birthday. She came to work on her birthday and didn't really have anything planned, so I wanted to bring her a bit of joy! She and I have become close and have shared a lot of great conversations about faith (she is Muslim and I am Christian).

• $9: I bought some cookies for my coworkers from a nearby cafe to add some joy to their day. One of my coworkers had kind of a difficult day at work, and I know that they all really enjoy the cookies from this cafe. I hope that we build more of a culture where we are intentionally kind to one another at work!

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you?

I wanted to use the $100 to encourage others and bring them joy! I specifically wanted to use it for people that I know personally but aren't necessarily close friends I would normally give something to. I wanted to challenge myself to bless people in my life who I don't normally think of.

In some ways, the process was harder than I thought it would be! $100 actually can go a long way, and I wanted to use it in a way that was really thoughtful and intentional. I thought it was wonderful how having the $100 made me look for opportunities to bless others and feel more freedom to be more generous. Although I did think carefully about the cost of each item, I felt more willing to spend more on others, such as bringing enough food to last the family for two meals instead of one. This process made me constantly think about how I could bless other people, and I especially enjoyed how it made me think about people in my life that I can care more about and be more intentional with, such as my coworkers.

Soul 2: Kirsten

How have your trials made you stronger? Trials have given me experience to grow from, lessons to learn in the midst, and testimonies to share to those around me who go through similar things. One of the biggest lies we believe is that we are alone in different situations. We feel so much shame and guilt that we don’t even talk about certain trials going on. But once we are honest with each other and realize that we aren’t alone in certain situations, that’s when there is so much power and freedom to learn from one another and power for God to work.
What advice would you give to the next generation of strong women? I would say lead out of vulnerability and humility. There is so much power in vulnerability. It can be scary, but it’s worth it. Never think that you have it all together. Be honest with yourself and with others. Walk in constant gratitude and thankfulness. Know who your identity is in and lead in godly confidence.

Kirsten’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100? I gave $100 to my dear friend, Sorenbeni, in Bangalore, India. She is someone I worked with and ministered alongside when I lived in India for eight months. I felt that God put her on my heart specifically to bless. Sorenbeni is one of the hardest workers I know and lately she has been feeling discouraged. I felt like God wanted to use me to show her that He sees her, He loves her, and that He wanted to surprise and bless her. She barely makes enough money to live off of and I wanted her to feel like God cares about not just what we need in life but also the things we dream of.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? It was REALLY special to be a part of such an intentional act! It was a joy to seek and ask God who He wanted to bless. And it blessed me to bless others. Wow, I love the heart of generosity and this has inspired me to be more generous with what I have and to invest in other people’s lives!

Soul 1: Heather

How does your culture shape your perception of strength? As women from the United States, we have a vast array of opportunities. We have freedom and liberty that can only be dreamed about in other parts of the world. However, there is also an expectation of independence and strength that I think is unique to our culture. Growing up, I was taught that strength is measured by a person’s successes in life and their ability to accomplish things independently. As a result, I was a very independent young woman and I did not want to ask for help, even if I needed it. More recently, I have had to re-frame my thinking to get rid of these perceptions. I now think that it takes much more strength to recognize our own limitations and ask for help when needed, as opposed to attempting to handle everything independently.

How have your trials made you stronger? Each of the trials that I have experienced made me realize that my strength really comes from God. As I evaluated the difficult things I was living through, I decided that I did not want to be a victim. I wanted to put in the time and effort to heal emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually from the wounds of my past. I wanted to become a woman that has faced adversity, but is still whole hearted and flourishing in spite of the things I had survived. As I was more and more willing to allow God to bring healing and restorations into the broken areas of my life, I discovered new strength each day that allowed me to keep pushing forward.

*If you want to learn more about Heather’s story serving in Africa, she’d be happy to hear from you and you can send her an email: heather.haney@sim.org

Heather’s Intentional Act of Kindness

How did you use the $100?

• $70.20 For Mending the Soul student edition books, olive branch rings, and cards for two teenage girls who had recently been sexually assaulted. I understand that something like this has the power to completely derail their relationships with God, or the power to strengthen it. I really hope that the books and small gifts are an encouragement to those young ladies.

• 5,000 CFA = $8.64 To send a widow to a Christian women’s retreat. She works very hard to provide for her children and has such a hunger to grow in her relationship with the Lord and to share His love with others. I see so much strength in her! I had complete peace about helping her to go to this retreat where she will be able to flourish in her faith and become better equipped to share her story.

• 4,000 CFA = $6.91 For material to make a portable baby scale for Galmi Hospital. I will be able to give medical care to critically ill infants even faster. This will decrease mortality and morbidity rates and help put children back in their parents’ arms.

• 2,000 CFA = $3.46 Donated to a small struggling church in an unreached community in Niger. The pastor is a very strong Christian and loves the Lord very much. He has had this small church for over twenty years in this town and he continues to persevere even though it is just his family and one or two young boys from the community that attend. I know that these funds will be used to bless this church and enable the pastor’s family to continue to work in this area for years to come.

• 6,244 CFA = $10.79 Bought supplies to make a meal for a single female missionary with a bunch of food allergies that has been feeling isolated and burned out. She has been robbed 3 times in the past 9 months and is very discouraged at the moment. I felt that making her a meal and sending it home with her would speak to her love language and help her to experience some refreshment.

What was the ‘Intentional Act of Kindness’ process like for you? I was shocked how far the money went. I was able to bless so many more people that I imagined was possible with just $100 dollars. It was a wonderful experience. It made me much more aware of the needs of others around me. I really enjoyed getting to be creative and personalize the “blessing” to the person receiving it. When I was purchasing cards for the two girls, I got a pack with extra cards, so I am looking forward to waiting and watching for the right time to use them and continue to do ‘Intentional Acts of Kindness.’